Chemo #6

When I started chemo and herceptin my doctor wanted me to get six rounds in. I am thankful that my body could do it! I am physically and emotionally tired and worn-out, but if more chemo is needed I know I could do it. However, I won't like it (nor do I think I have to)!

I spent this past Friday-Monday up in Edmonton for another round of tests (CT, Bone scan, and MUGA scan). I will get the results on June 4th. Then I will find out if I need more of the same chemo, a new type of chemo, or a totally different type of treatment (hormone therapy...).

My sister Tara has taken up photography and I was her first subject. Canada's Next Top Model won't be scouting me out, but she did a great job in making my 'hairless' shots original. Although I am okay with not having hair, I am really ready to have it grow back. The odd time it is hard to look in the mirror and see this sick person looking back. Although I recognize her, I don't always know who is looking back. I will never be the same Brenda I was prior to cancer and I am not quite sure who the new Brenda is either. I was reading an article in Success Magazine about Lance Armstrong and he was sharing that after cancer treatment when I he got on his bike it felt really foreign to him, and he didn't really know what he was supposed to 'do'. That's me. Right now I am just trying to be still and know that he is God and that he has a great plan for my life.