What Life Will Bring?


I was laying in bed last weekend and I was pondering the shutting down of my ovaries. We will never have a child together. As I said before, I believe God prepared me for this a long time ago, but it is still something very significant to digest. If this stupid disease takes me, I won't be able to leave anybody with my eyes or my stubby legs behind. I always had this fantasy that we would have children and Carman would cave in and let them take my last name. I am very proud to be an Odovichuc, and I like the uniqueness the name provides. Will I ever be healthy enough to be a candidate for adoption?

While all this was going through my head, God reminded me of sitting on a beach in the Philippines surrounded by little girls selling jewelry and their 'jewelry pimp'. Two of the girls were trying really hard to sell me jewelryand I wasn't budging. I just smiled at them and started reading my book. One of the girls sat behind me and started reading my book out loud - she was really good at reading and I just let her amuse me. After awhile more of the girls came and sat down and we just chatted (no more jewelery antics). Probably because the girls weren't working their 'pimp' came over too. We had quite an interesting conversation. I asked why the girls were selling jewelry and not at home or just out playing with their friends (it was a Saturday). He claimed that their families need the money and every dollar counts.

How does this memory fit into my future? I don't have clue. God just brought it to my mind. I don't want God to be done with me yet. Will he let me grow old and grey? What is your will for my life Lord?

Tidak ada komentar:

Posting Komentar